BEST BEFORE USA: Millan Dollar Man

Continuing with our US edition of Best Before December, today we caught up with Cesar Millan of The Dog Whisperer fame to ask him for his views on the state of America, Sarah Palin, cats, Lacoste and the American race for President.

On The New World Order
It's like Planet of the Apes, you know...but one day, as sure as I am of the beard on my face, the new world order shall come. Dogs will be our masters and we will all have to be kept on a leash.

On Sarah Palin
You know, pit bull's shouldn't wear lipstick. Her temperament is all wrong. She needs to learn respect the hard way. Then one day she could get her rewards and join the pack of dogs in the White House. Maybe. Til then her master has to be brave and put a muzzle over her stupid yankee mouth.

On Cats
They should be exterminated. They are cold, selfish, verminous creatures. You know, they distract the Canines in a way that I don't like. You can't domesticate them, you know? Cats are not smart , funny or cute. Their owners have no control or self-discipline. They're a bit strange, no? I guess they brought Aids into this world.

On religion
God is a dog, no? Think about it. (Cesar beams for a long time)

On Lacoste
Lacoste is my friend. Lacoste doesn't judge. I never wear the same shirt for than one day in my life. If I could never buy Lacoste I would kill something.

Eating habits
If you wanna be the natural pack leader you have to eat from the same bowl as your dogs. You have to live like a dog to conquer the divine species. I do this all the time. Dogs.

Obama/McCain
You know, I'm not so sure they are brave enough to make the US a state of Mexico. Don't think they are ready for that challenge. I hope I live to see the day when the future president of the United States is a German shepard dog or a Beagle. In Mexico.

On the near future
I can't see myself doing ths forever. Something's calling me, you know, to the wild. I see the sunset of my life being the leader of a pack of wolves...in the mountains...before I am killed by a silver bullet one careless winter day...