Forgive the delay. I was going to write a piece about how I wasn't going to be making any new years resolutions as they were pointless. I was going to deride those who follow a pathetic detox programme as new age tossers who just put themselves through a silly routine to be fashionable. If I was going to make any resolutions then I was going to make a few on the behalf of coloumists such as Deborah Orr and Ross, and Zoe Williams and all the others who write articles from the so called 'Everyman' perspective (as if this is a justification) in the belief that we care about their trivial lives and opinion. I suppose I may figure partially in this but I will try and spare you my dull life. I would have resolved for them to quit their coloums.
Another resolution I would have made on the behalf of Sharon Osbourne would be for her to pose the question- 'Has the viewing public had enough of my shit hairstyle, my faux anti-establishment attitude,blunt razor wit and chicken fart voice?'
While we're at it, I would have resolved to be one of the first to start the David Cameron backlash, in the name of the fact that most politicians are hypocritical cunt ulcers. The rimming from the media must stop. I can see many followers being embarassed.
